A little early with my post-weekend blog. Right now I’m watching the London Marathon ‘highlights‘ and the rain out the window hoping that it’ll pass and I can sneak in a run. Otherwise it might be more time on the bike and really I’ve biked a lot lately and could do with a bit more running. The return to swimming with the club went better than I feared; there’s nothing like a hard 100m front crawl set that leaves you coughing for breath and wondering if your vomit to welcome you back (I didn’t).
I was at home for the first time in weeks and with relatively few weekends home left I attempted to sort some of my possessions. I have a lot of possessions, really, loads. It’d be fair to say that before I really got into racing my main interest was accumulating stuff. I don’t really regret it, but it’s a pain in the arse now. Everything I own that I don’t take with me either has to be stored at my parents or got rid of. What I’ve learnt as I try to dispose of things is if you look on e-bay, not much of my stuff is worth much to others. Currently Oxfam will be doing pretty well I think.
But the real problem I have isn’t so much about the money, or giving this stuff away, nor the space available for storage. I just don’t know whether I want to keep a lot of this stuff. On the one hand as I go through the hundreds of Science Fiction books I own I find loads of classics of the genre. I’ll not read them again, I don’t reread books, at the same time there are some great titles here. Really my choice is do I keep these books so that when I return, should I decide to settle, I’ll have some books to cover my walls. And really, what is that for, to reference? Or simply so I can remind myself or others of how much I’ve read.
So I’ve spent a lot of time considering this. It’s fair to say that the urge to possess things is gone, I don’t really feel much need to accumulate stuff or spend my money on things. Sure I spend money, but it’s to go places, do things or on the equipment needed to meet those ends (OK and food). At the same time, disposing of chunks of my property for money or not seems a big step. It’s not really that I fear I’ll need them anymore (and supposing I did I guess I’d buy what was needed again, I can’t need it all), I think it’s just hard to make such a clear statement of a break from the past. Still as today has gone on I’m increasingly inclined to make that break and to let Oxfam do very well indeed.
I achieved a little bit towards this aim this weekend; a few books are gone. The next step is to make the decision one way or the other and commit to it. Once it’s done no going back and no regretting it.
The weather looks poor still, if I run I’m getting wet that’s for sure. Over 20 hours training this week with a rest day which isn’t too bad, but I feel I just need a little bit more running in there. Guess I’d better follow my wristband and HTFU!